1.
You somehow manage to function while you’re growing a literal human.
Morning sickness, well-intentioned questions, strangers rubbing your belly, hormones, insomnia etc life must go on, but it’s that extra bit harder when your body is all systems go on developing a baby.
2.
You surrender to the process of birth, whatever that may entail.
If you have a plan, you can be pretty sure it won’t come off. When you’re playing the waiting game, your mind can spiral into all sorts of possibilities with what will happen during birth and all you can do is steel yourself by remembering that a safe arrival is an achievable goal.
3.
You step into a high-pressure role while recovering from a life-changing event.
No matter how your baby arrived, it’s safe to say it ranks highly on your life moments list. You’re likely bumped, bruised, stitched, pricked and utterly exhausted. Now, here’s a tiny human that’s totally reliant on you.
4.
You weather the pain of breastfeeding and/or weaning.
Whether you stick with breastfeeding or head straight into weaning, tolerating the buffet of pain, fluctuations, looming threat of mastitis, let down, cracked nipples and more should let you qualify as a CIA operative.
5.
You operate on circa three hours of broken sleep.
Another skill that will come in handy if you ever segue into a career as a spy, functioning while sleep deprived is a real trip. When you’re staring down the barrel of another long and lonely night, it’s pure strength that gets you through.
6.
You stand strong in this body that created and carried new life.
You carry battle scars, seen and unseen, and your body has changed in ways you discover for a long time but, my goodness, what a miracle it is. To think what you’ve achieved to create, nurture and sustain new life. Incredible!
7.
You master negotiating with a toddler devoid of rationale or reason.
Ever seen that movie Horrible Bosses? The plot rings true, except replace Jennifer Anniston with a pint-sized person who has a tantrum about having a bath followed by a tantrum in response to getting out of said bath. Send help!
8.
You learn to live with your heart in a perpetual vice.
That tiny human conjures up the most heartstring-tugging emotions in you from day one and things won’t change. Every tear, every tumble you’ll feel too. This beautiful conundrum will require your strongest stuff.
9.
You create an entirely new love language from scratch.
The blank canvas of communication is a constant work in progress, one that offers frustration, confusion, desperation, hilarity, adoration and joy. This project has no deadline, it’s a marathon, not a sprint and it will test you but ultimately it will make you.
